dialogues – did you eat chocolate?

— Did you eat chocolate?
— How do you know?
— Your breath smells like chocolate.
— Oh! Yes, I did.
— You were not even able to deny it.
— Do you want me to be a liar? You’re the one who buys the chocolate. You’re luring me.
— Yes, It’s true that I buy the chocolate, but I’m thin. And besides, it was hidden.
— Hidden? What a great hiding place, in front of the crackers. Conclusion, I am fat and greedy. And the fact that you’re thin gives you the right to eat the chocolate by yourself? And all this revolt because of 100 grams of chocolate – you insult me.
— Insults? Are not you fat?
— Of course I’m not fat, I’m overweight.
— That’s right … and you were not greedy about eating aaaaall the chocolate?
— Of course not, I was an opportunist. Opportunity makes a glutton.
— You’re right, you’re not fat or greedy… you’re a dick. Jeez!
— I do not say no to that. When are you going to buy and hide more chocolate?
— Turn off the light and sleep.